When it is simply not a parent's choice

Growing up, you make lots of decisions but I have never made as many as I do now since I have had children. I have made the decision to cloth diaper, to breastfeed, to rear face in her car seat as long as possible, for them to eat whole food instead of purees, and to co-sleep among many others. Who knew the choices I made and sharing information about them would alienate myself from friends.

Some of my decisions were based on personal choice. I really disliked feeding my daughter puréed food so we made the switch to her feeding herself whole food. Our son will start directly with whole food in several months from now as well. Other choices were made purely from a safety stand point. When Abigail was approaching a year old, I started researching what her next car seat would be. We assumed she would be turning forward facing at 12months because that is the norm. After watching crash testing videos, I soon realized how important and safer it is to keep them rear facing. Instead of sticking with the bare minimum and turning her once it was legal to do so, she is still rear facing now at 3 years old and will remain that way for hopefully another year.

There are some instances though where it should not be up to the parent to make the decision. If it is terribly cold one day, you make sure to dress your babies appropriately for them to stay warm. When preparing their meals, you make sure that the food is not burning hot. These seem like no brainers. Why would "how to harness a child correctly in their car seat" cause such a stir? It is simple. You read the manual and you follow what it says in order to use the seat properly. No after-market accessories like those big sleeping bags, no big poofy jackets and straps must be snug against their thighs and body. When these points are not followed, your seat can no longer function properly when needed.

Often we don't know these important points. We used one of those bags in Abigail's car seat when she was an infant to help keep her warm before learning the dangerous effect they could have in the event of a crash. When Zachary was born in the midst of winter, I still wanted to use it so I cut a section out of it to make it safe. There was no longer thick fabric between him and his car seat that could compress in a crash and would create slack in his harness straps. And when straps are not tight enough, baby could slip right out of their seat. I have explained this directly to friends and family when I have been questioned about Abigail and Zachary's lack of winter jacket when it is -20*C outside.

I will continue to share information pertaining my parenting choices because they are aspects that I agree with and are passionate about. It doesn't mean that those choosing differently are bad parents. We have simply made different decisions based on the different aspects we find important. As for safety concerns, I will continue sharing that information in hopes that a parent will read it and learn something. It is never meant to be a direct attack on someone's choice, whether or not I agree with the choice.

If you saw something that could potentially be dangerous, would you bring it up to the parent?

End of the "4th trimester" and the beginning of a whole new chapter

You hear lots about this 4th trimester. It makes complete sense though. He was in my belly for 9 months. Always nice and warm. The sound of my voice and heart beat kept him calm. And then he comes out into this big, loud, cold world. It's no wonder all he wants to do is be held and loved. And I have no problem doing that! I wouldn't change a single thing about how things have progressed lately. He is growing like mad (6/14 at birth and 14lbs at 10.5 weeks) and he is developing beautifully. We are now entering the "he can slightly control his hands" phase. Once he grabs ahold of something (toys, socks, or hair!) he has quite the good grip on it.

We are now entering a whole new chapter in my life. I am now staying home with both kids full time. Abigail is no longer in daycare. As much as she loved it there, it just didn't make sense to keep paying for it when I could easily keep her at home. I remember when I was a child myself, saying that I wanted to stay home with kids instead of working. So here I am. Today was our first "real" day and it was great. We celebrated Earth Day by putting laundry out on the line, transplanting a rhubarb plant, kicking around a soccer ball, and going for a walk in the evening as a family. I'm really trying to establish a daily routine similar to the one she followed at daycare. It will allow us to plan activities and help keep us organize when Keegan goes back out to sea with the military for 10 weeks this summer. I am actually more excited to see how Abigail and Zachary will get along now that they will be ending all day together.

I think they will be ok. :)

Do you follow a daily/weekly routine with your kids to help things run smoothly?